where would we be

As soon as I was certain I was in love with 'herself'... I came out. I came out to my children, my family and to my friends.
They took the news with admirable aplomb.

I am aware that a few would still prefer me to fall for some hunky, hairy man and resume my previous straight lifestyle.

There might well be one or two who would prefer I take vows, enter a convent and live out my life in celibacy!

Yeah well...and we all know that ain't about to happen.

So, all in all I had a pretty easy ride on the coming out train.

When I moved to Scotland, I felt no particular need to ascend a local steeple and pronounce my queerness. Herself was not in residence with me. There was no one I felt close enough to that I needed to share the simple fact that I was lesbian. After all there is more to me ...
If someone is sufficiently interested in me and they feel a need to ask about anything in my life...
Well, I am a communicator, a master in the art of thought sharing... ask and you will receive.

I met ScotsLass, we worked together, we became friends... she fed me delicious meals, we drank copious glasses of wine, we shared many wonderful hours together. We were really good friends and I had still not mentioned the fact that i was queer.

Until this Thursday. Whilst in the village I popped in for a cup of coffee and a bit of a blether with SL. My friend had a surprise for me... her man had bought her a laptop, come Tuesday next week...they would have an internet connection. SC was delighted she would finally be able to read my blogs!

Oh fudge! I almost choked on my last sip of coffee. Read my blogs... omg...she had no idea of my sexual preferences. She knew of Manfred, the children the grandchildren, she knew I had a very dear friend in the States who I visited frequently.

Time to come clean. For the first time I felt fear. I love this girl...
I value her friendship...
I enjoy her company...
Damn...these days i even understand her Scots accents. Well mostly!

What if...

So I sashayed over to SL and her new laptop, I swallowed...

"ummmm...about my blogs...ummmm...there's something I need to tell you...ummmmm"


By now SL is starting to look rather alarmed, her eyes widen and I imagine the thought process taking place...

"omg...this crazy friend of mine, this nomadic wanderer, this escapee from Africa...
this person who has eaten my food and drunk my wine and petted my dogs...
Eryll, the articulate is soooo tongue tied, her blog must be ... at the very least...pornographic!"

I take my cowardly self in hand...

"Well ummmm...actually...ummm...I'm kind of bi sexual...
my friend..."herself" was actually my lover, my partner"

Bloody hell, what a twit! I ask you with tears in my eyes...kind of bi sexual. That was the best I could do...oy vay!

A smile to light a dark day broke across her face. She threw her head back and laughed...
"Well I had my own suspicions" she said.
"Why were you so nervous about telling me...you idiot...you are my friend!"

Friends...where would we be without them?